Since separating from my daughter's mother for the 3rd & final time some 4 years ago, I've mastered the art. Fortunately, we have a rather amicable relationship now & there are few times when I have to employ such skilled restraint.
This is unusual for me, as I am a great believer in open and honest dialogue wherever possible. Communication - or lack thereof - has tripped up so many relationships that I've either been witness to or a part of, along with a lack in understanding - usually on one side, sometimes on both - which is in part due to communication, but moreso due to the level of recognition.
When I say "recognition", I mean that which you find with another like-minded soul. Not just someone you have some things in common with, or someone you find appealing on a few levels, or someone you like to be around because they show an interest in you, but someone who is all-encompassing & just "gets" you and you them, as with kindred spirits: "the spark of recognition".
With this, there is no need for the disciplined biting of tongues, no holding back, no fear of reprisal, or worse indifference.
Lately I've been re-schooling myself in this discipline in other aspects of my life. When all I want to do is shout out from the rooftops, yell at the sky, the sun, the moon, the trees, the Air - anything that will listen - and profess my wants, mind, desire, knowledge, love, frustration.
But I bite down firmly.
The irony is, I only have positive things to say.
-"And when my stitches come undone
I lose the stuff that fills me
I hold you and suddenly I'm better for it
You make my hard life easy"
Satellite Party - Hard Life Easy
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