3 Dreams: Freedom, Distance, Planned

2230

Last night as I was sinking into my bed I dreamt that we were flying. The day was sunny, together we weaved through the air, free, natural & naked, coming together to be close, meet & hold hands, then swerving in & out of each other's flight paths, as if fueled by pure joy, our vapor trails forming a double helix in our wake.

Looking into you, I mouthed the words.

You felt the full force of them.

This is freedom.
-

0449

I had a plan: to take you to a beach on the north shore, share a salt & pepper squid basket, freshly cooked & tongue-burning hot. I wanted to play a new song that I had written for you, but you were nowhere to be seen. The place set for you at the restaurant table confusingly empty. The physical distance between us tangible.

Although you were not present, I felt that you were still interested. I was a bit lost, looking for a way to get this message to you, and wanting you to know of my plan to give you this experience, but I didn't know how to do so within the bounds that had been set between us.

I don't know when in time this dream was set, but questions plagued me: are you ready to be friends yet? Is it too soon? Are you happier without my presence in your life?

I know where the experience would've taken us: to watch the moon on a warmish midnight beach, through to 0200, enveloped by blankets as we fall asleep, our combined temperatures dropping, awakened just before dawn to watch the sunrise, another item checked off our endless list.

All the while the refrain looped in the background:

"stranded starfish have no place to hide,
Still waiting for the swollen Easter tide".

-

0527

I dreamt that I awoke at 0447, compelled by subspace to check my mailbox.

I could clearly read the email you had sent: 2 files attached, both sets of lyrics, the body of the message reading only:

"you are one of my planned songs".

The dream was so real. In the half-awake state directly after waking I felt only half sure of the reality, immediately checking my mailbox... Reality was not kind to me, but the beauty of that one sentence held its warmth still.